How To Love Difficult People

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Look around you.

What you see around and on different media platforms tells about series of unfortunate events. There are lots of global issues within this world that we can definitely relive and re-sing Black Eyed Peas’ 2003 hit song, Where Is The Love?

Terrorism, atrocity, genocide, even the simple act of abandoning one’s own child and stealing are just few of the many reasons why most of us find it hard to love others. These are why we are hopeless that love is nowhere to be found in each and every person’s heart and why it’s easy to ignore rather than extend compassion to others.

Loving our families and friends are easy peasy. It is, because there is an absolute exchange of care and support from us and them. It’s easy because when we’re hurt, we receive their comfort. When we’re happy, they celebrate with us.

But how about loving the person whom just maltreated your loved one? What about those robbers, those terrorists who just killed thousands? Those corrupt government officials? Those rapists? Drug addicts? Think about those people who hurt you, the ones who crushed your heart and broke it to pieces. Can you say, you love them still despite what they have done?

Pain is the sum of pride plus broken trust. It clips our hearts and crushes the veins and arteries until it fails to pump anymore. It stops us from seeing what’s really important, blinding us from all the good things left around us. So if you will ask me, Marianne, how in the world am I gonna love these kinds of people? There’s just no way!

Good news! There is a way because Someone had set an example for us to follow. Take a look at what Paul said in Ephesians 5:25, “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” I need not to compare Jesus from us because we know for sure that He is blameless and we are sinners. We are dirtier than the dirtiest dirt ever.

But these dirts were loved by Him who is the “image of the invisible God” (Colossians 1:15). Despite our rebellion He “suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, that he might bring us to God” (1 Peter 3:18). He was the bridge that led us to our Heavenly Father. Despite our doubts during difficult times, He “will not leave you comfortless” (John 14:18 KJV). And even though it feels like everybody is leaving us and there’s nothing left of us, He promises us in Matthew 28:20 this: “And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”

Knowing this, how can we actually love others? I am not going to list down specific steps but I am going to note three important things Jesus said:

Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. (1 John 4:8)

‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ (Mark 12:31)

And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’ (Matthew 25:40)

If you consider yourself as a person who believes, loves and follows Jesus, I know in your heart that you want to do things that please Him. It is indeed to difficult to love others who hurt us but it is more difficult to live a life that has a ball of hatred inside. We are not aware that this ball will develop into a dangerous bomb and anytime it will explode, destroying us. So, I say that we begin by seeing others as “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14). Forgive and be humble enough to accept the fact that everyone makes mistakes. Everybody is capable of hurting somebody and it’s time to let go of pride and just extend the love of Jesus to our brothers and sisters.


3 thoughts on “How To Love Difficult People

  1. It also states that we are to hold those accountable who have hurt us.
    Jesus says if those who have hurt us refuse to listen to council have nothing to do with them. Matthew 18:15-17 and Paul said the same thing Titus 3:10
    Jesus says to repent and your sins are forgiven.
    We are not to hate but neither are we to allow us to be a door mat.


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